1 00:00:01,155 --> 00:00:04,734 That is the most selfish, mindless piece of driving 2 00:00:04,791 --> 00:00:05,730 I have ever witnessed. 3 00:00:05,820 --> 00:00:07,659 Keep your hair on, I'll be under 60 seconds. 4 00:00:07,660 --> 00:00:09,259 Idiot. Snotty bitch. 5 00:00:09,260 --> 00:00:12,819 Some braindead, lowlife, trailer trash stole my parking space. 6 00:00:12,820 --> 00:00:15,819 And you've met my daughter? Sorry? 7 00:00:15,820 --> 00:00:18,099 Now then, we've got some news for you. 8 00:00:18,100 --> 00:00:19,820 We're getting married. 9 00:00:21,460 --> 00:00:23,900 You're very pretty. You're magnificent. 10 00:00:28,460 --> 00:00:32,459 This marriage is over! It is dead! It is redundant! 11 00:00:32,460 --> 00:00:34,259 It never was! 12 00:00:34,260 --> 00:00:35,659 We made love. 13 00:00:35,660 --> 00:00:37,979 It was my birthday, we were both a bit pissed. 14 00:00:37,980 --> 00:00:42,699 'He's in hospital. He were rushed in last night. He had a heart attack.' 15 00:00:42,700 --> 00:00:45,779 Did I come to see you last night? 16 00:00:45,780 --> 00:00:48,339 Alan? Or were I dreaming? 17 00:00:48,340 --> 00:00:54,419 Yes, you did. You came to see me. 18 00:00:54,420 --> 00:00:56,100 I love you. 19 00:00:59,029 --> 00:01:33,625 Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells http://UKsubtitles.ru. 20 00:01:45,369 --> 00:01:48,725 He's come round, he's regained consciousness. 21 00:01:48,725 --> 00:01:50,484 'Oh, Mum!' 22 00:01:50,485 --> 00:01:55,324 Gillian's just in with him just now. She's just chatting to him. 23 00:01:55,325 --> 00:01:57,085 Alan's come round. 24 00:01:58,325 --> 00:02:00,364 'And are they...?' 25 00:02:00,365 --> 00:02:03,164 Is he, erm...? Are they confident he's going to...? 26 00:02:03,165 --> 00:02:08,204 Well, I mean, it's early days but he seems very perky. 27 00:02:08,205 --> 00:02:10,124 'You mustn't tire him.' 28 00:02:10,125 --> 00:02:11,965 I'm not going to tire him! 29 00:02:16,525 --> 00:02:17,565 I love you. 30 00:02:18,845 --> 00:02:19,885 I love you. 31 00:02:22,045 --> 00:02:24,044 I think I love Celia as well. 32 00:02:24,045 --> 00:02:25,124 So do I. 33 00:02:25,125 --> 00:02:27,965 Hey, you can keep your hands off her. She's mine. 34 00:02:39,365 --> 00:02:40,524 What are you going to do? 35 00:02:40,525 --> 00:02:42,684 Are you going to stay with us here, or are you...? 36 00:02:42,685 --> 00:02:46,684 Oh, I think I'd like to be on hand over the next few days, 37 00:02:46,685 --> 00:02:49,364 just till we know what's what. I mean, if that's... 38 00:02:49,365 --> 00:02:50,924 It's wonderful, it's perfect. 39 00:02:50,925 --> 00:02:54,244 Do you want me to drive over to Harrogate, fetch any of your things? 40 00:02:54,245 --> 00:02:58,244 No, no. You don't want to be setting off, you need to be here. 41 00:02:58,245 --> 00:03:01,724 No, I'll get Lady Muck to bring over a few bits and pieces. 42 00:03:01,725 --> 00:03:03,244 She won't mind. 43 00:03:03,245 --> 00:03:05,644 Celia... What? 44 00:03:05,645 --> 00:03:08,044 I just... Can I just... 45 00:03:08,045 --> 00:03:09,684 What, love? 46 00:03:09,685 --> 00:03:11,764 ..hug you? Oh! 47 00:03:11,765 --> 00:03:13,164 Thank you. 48 00:03:13,165 --> 00:03:15,324 Thank you for making him so happy 49 00:03:15,325 --> 00:03:18,444 and thank you for bringing him back. 50 00:03:18,445 --> 00:03:22,004 Do you know? I think I did. 51 00:03:22,005 --> 00:03:24,364 No, I know you did. 52 00:03:24,365 --> 00:03:27,124 Now, you mustn't fall out with him again. 53 00:03:27,125 --> 00:03:29,204 Oh, well, it was him that fell out with me. 54 00:03:29,205 --> 00:03:31,684 Yeah, well, whatever. You know what I'm saying. 55 00:03:31,685 --> 00:03:35,404 I am never going to fall out with him again. 56 00:03:35,405 --> 00:03:39,245 Ever! About anything. 57 00:04:01,245 --> 00:04:02,964 There you go, ladies. 58 00:04:02,965 --> 00:04:04,844 You're a gem, and a star. Thanks, love. 59 00:04:04,845 --> 00:04:07,724 I've penned that ewe up on her own in t'barn and I've made a lasagne. 60 00:04:07,725 --> 00:04:11,204 There's enough for everybody, if Caroline wants something when she gets here. 61 00:04:11,205 --> 00:04:13,404 Have you any idea how good he's been? 62 00:04:13,405 --> 00:04:16,444 It's ME. Are you packing me that suitcase? 63 00:04:16,445 --> 00:04:18,084 I have packed you that suitcase. 64 00:04:18,085 --> 00:04:21,964 Robbie says he'll have a bit of supper ready for you when you get here, if you like. 65 00:04:21,965 --> 00:04:23,684 'Oh, that's lovely.' 66 00:04:23,685 --> 00:04:26,364 Thank you, tell him. 'And Gillian says you're welcome to stop 67 00:04:26,365 --> 00:04:28,324 'the night, if you don't fancy turning round 68 00:04:28,325 --> 00:04:32,364 'and driving straight back.' OK. Great. Why not? 69 00:04:32,365 --> 00:04:34,084 So we'll see you in a bit. 70 00:04:34,085 --> 00:04:36,124 Yeah, bye. 'Drive carefully.' 71 00:04:36,125 --> 00:04:39,084 Yeah, I will. Bye-bye. 72 00:04:39,085 --> 00:04:42,524 Why don't I pop over with her bits and pieces? You? 73 00:04:42,525 --> 00:04:46,084 Well, it'll save you time and... The best thing you can do, if you want to be useful, 74 00:04:46,085 --> 00:04:48,444 is stay here with the boys cos I might stay over there. 75 00:04:48,445 --> 00:04:51,364 Why? Well, just tonight. Why not? 76 00:04:51,365 --> 00:04:54,644 They're old enough to... why don't I come with you? 77 00:04:54,645 --> 00:04:56,764 Come... What for? 78 00:04:56,765 --> 00:05:01,644 Well, so I can apologise to everyone for... 79 00:05:01,645 --> 00:05:04,524 Well, it was all my fault, wasn't it? How? 80 00:05:04,525 --> 00:05:08,284 Well, if I hadn't told Celia about you being... 81 00:05:08,285 --> 00:05:11,364 And then if she hadn't reacted so badly to that, 82 00:05:11,365 --> 00:05:13,204 Alan wouldn't have seen how 83 00:05:13,205 --> 00:05:15,924 small-minded and bigoted she... can be 84 00:05:15,925 --> 00:05:18,244 and then if they hadn't fallen out about that, 85 00:05:18,245 --> 00:05:22,604 he might not have got upset and had... had... had the... 86 00:05:22,605 --> 00:05:23,765 the heart attack. 87 00:05:25,525 --> 00:05:27,684 But it really is all about you, isn't it? 88 00:05:27,685 --> 00:05:29,004 That's... That's just... 89 00:05:29,005 --> 00:05:31,804 When I get back, we really do need to work out what's what 90 00:05:31,805 --> 00:05:35,364 and whose is what and all the rest of it. 91 00:05:35,365 --> 00:05:38,204 Boys! 92 00:05:38,205 --> 00:05:41,485 I'm off over to Halifax. 93 00:05:42,805 --> 00:05:44,445 Dad's going to be here. 94 00:05:45,805 --> 00:05:49,765 I'm on my mobile if you want me. I'll see you later. 95 00:06:16,125 --> 00:06:20,725 Mum, you've got a text. 96 00:06:51,045 --> 00:06:52,644 'Halifax?' 97 00:06:52,645 --> 00:06:55,684 Yeah! He's come round, he's regained consciousness. 98 00:06:55,685 --> 00:06:56,924 'Oh!' 99 00:06:56,925 --> 00:07:00,444 Yeah, he's going to be fine. Well, we hope. 100 00:07:00,445 --> 00:07:03,044 'That's...' I know. 101 00:07:03,045 --> 00:07:05,485 ..fantastic. 'So I'll be back tomorrow.' 102 00:07:06,725 --> 00:07:11,884 Oh. So, we're not doing anything tonight, then? 103 00:07:11,885 --> 00:07:14,085 Well, we left it up in the air, didn't we? 104 00:07:16,045 --> 00:07:17,204 So, is that all right? 105 00:07:17,205 --> 00:07:21,285 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, course. 106 00:07:22,365 --> 00:07:25,324 We'll do something tomorrow. 107 00:07:25,325 --> 00:07:26,365 Good. 108 00:07:31,685 --> 00:07:34,884 Can I just check your blood pressure, Mr Buttershaw? 109 00:07:34,885 --> 00:07:37,884 Hm? Oh, yes. 110 00:07:37,885 --> 00:07:41,924 How are you feeling? I'm very happy. 111 00:07:41,925 --> 00:07:44,164 I was watching you. You and your wife. 112 00:07:44,165 --> 00:07:47,364 You're just so completely in love with each other, aren't you? 113 00:07:47,365 --> 00:07:48,764 She's not my wife yet. 114 00:07:48,765 --> 00:07:51,685 But I do think we need to get on with it. 115 00:07:53,005 --> 00:07:56,044 We are popping up back to the hospital again, aren't we, Gillian? 116 00:07:56,045 --> 00:07:59,084 This evening? Absolutely. I'd like to. 117 00:07:59,085 --> 00:08:00,524 Do you need me to come? 118 00:08:00,525 --> 00:08:01,844 Why? Have you got plans? 119 00:08:01,845 --> 00:08:02,884 Ellie. 120 00:08:02,885 --> 00:08:05,564 Who? Girlfriend. She's not my girlfriend. 121 00:08:05,565 --> 00:08:08,924 She running rings round you again? 122 00:08:08,925 --> 00:08:10,844 She's not like that. What is she like? 123 00:08:10,845 --> 00:08:12,884 She does blow hot and cold. 124 00:08:12,885 --> 00:08:16,684 Oh, you don't want that. Life's too short. We're just mates. 125 00:08:16,685 --> 00:08:18,884 She uses you. She doesn't use me. 126 00:08:18,885 --> 00:08:20,844 She damn well does! Once. 127 00:08:20,845 --> 00:08:22,484 What happened? Nothing. 128 00:08:22,485 --> 00:08:24,404 They had a date. "Date." 129 00:08:24,405 --> 00:08:27,084 Only she stood him up cos she got a better offer. 130 00:08:27,085 --> 00:08:28,884 Yeah, nice! Bitch. 131 00:08:28,885 --> 00:08:31,364 That ain't what happened. Is. 132 00:08:31,365 --> 00:08:33,084 How would you describe it? PHONE RINGS 133 00:08:33,085 --> 00:08:35,684 Well, I'd be minding me own business. 134 00:08:35,685 --> 00:08:38,125 John? What's he want? 135 00:08:40,045 --> 00:08:42,244 Hello? 'Celia! Hi.' 136 00:08:42,245 --> 00:08:43,724 'What's up?' 137 00:08:43,725 --> 00:08:47,524 Just ringing to let you know that Caroline's just set off, just now. 138 00:08:47,525 --> 00:08:48,884 Right. 139 00:08:48,885 --> 00:08:51,604 Probably be with you in an hour, an hour and a half. 140 00:08:51,605 --> 00:08:53,964 Right. 'How is he?' 141 00:08:53,965 --> 00:08:55,564 Alan? 142 00:08:55,565 --> 00:08:58,604 'Well, it's early days, but he's conscious anyway. 143 00:08:58,605 --> 00:09:00,284 'Didn't she tell you?' 144 00:09:00,285 --> 00:09:02,164 Good. Yes! She did. 145 00:09:02,165 --> 00:09:06,684 Is...? Could I...? Is Gillian there? 146 00:09:06,685 --> 00:09:10,604 Gillian? Yes, she's here, and Raff and Robbie. 147 00:09:10,605 --> 00:09:13,044 Could I...? Could I speak to her? 'Gillian?' 148 00:09:13,045 --> 00:09:15,164 Yes. 'What for?' 149 00:09:15,165 --> 00:09:17,484 'Well, just... just...' 150 00:09:17,485 --> 00:09:20,325 It's John. He's asking to speak to you. 151 00:09:21,525 --> 00:09:23,365 What about? 152 00:09:25,405 --> 00:09:26,564 Hello? 153 00:09:26,565 --> 00:09:28,484 Gillian. 'Yes.' 154 00:09:28,485 --> 00:09:29,564 It's John. 155 00:09:29,565 --> 00:09:31,564 Yes. 156 00:09:31,565 --> 00:09:34,084 Hi. Yes? 157 00:09:34,085 --> 00:09:37,924 'Look... Sorry. I realise you're cross with me.' 158 00:09:37,925 --> 00:09:39,244 Am I? 159 00:09:39,245 --> 00:09:40,964 Yeah. Aren't you? 160 00:09:40,965 --> 00:09:42,564 'For getting drunk and making a fuss 161 00:09:42,565 --> 00:09:45,124 'and spilling the beans about Caroline to Celia and...' 162 00:09:45,125 --> 00:09:46,244 Oh! 163 00:09:46,245 --> 00:09:47,804 ..so forth. 164 00:09:47,805 --> 00:09:49,884 Well, it's all water under t'bridge now, so... 165 00:09:49,885 --> 00:09:51,244 'Good. Good. Is it?' 166 00:09:51,245 --> 00:09:52,924 Gone and forgotten. 167 00:09:52,925 --> 00:09:55,044 Good. Good. Well, that's good. 168 00:09:55,045 --> 00:09:57,164 Bye, then. 169 00:09:57,165 --> 00:09:59,244 No. Wait. 170 00:09:59,245 --> 00:10:01,044 Then, there's the other thing. 171 00:10:01,045 --> 00:10:03,764 The other thing? 172 00:10:03,765 --> 00:10:07,764 'Could we...? I'd like to see you again.' 173 00:10:07,765 --> 00:10:11,364 Right. Well, that's... That's not... 174 00:10:11,365 --> 00:10:15,284 The thing is. Oh, God. 175 00:10:15,285 --> 00:10:17,284 Hello? 176 00:10:17,285 --> 00:10:20,084 I think I'm a little bit in love with you. 177 00:10:20,085 --> 00:10:24,324 Right. Right. OK. 178 00:10:24,325 --> 00:10:31,165 Well. That's... not exactly my problem as such, is it? 179 00:10:32,245 --> 00:10:34,204 You can't talk. Obviously. 180 00:10:34,205 --> 00:10:36,364 And there is that. 181 00:10:36,365 --> 00:10:39,484 'Maybe... Could we... meet up? 182 00:10:39,485 --> 00:10:41,364 'Somewhere? Sometime?' No. 183 00:10:41,365 --> 00:10:43,764 I don't mind popping over. 184 00:10:43,765 --> 00:10:46,764 Did you get my text message? Please don't say no. 185 00:10:46,765 --> 00:10:48,564 I don't think I could... 186 00:10:48,565 --> 00:10:51,564 OK, so shall I give you back to Celia? 187 00:10:51,565 --> 00:10:54,124 'No. No. I don't need to speak to Celia again.' 188 00:10:54,125 --> 00:10:55,964 No, OK. Ta-ta, then. 189 00:10:55,965 --> 00:10:58,364 Gillian. Gillian. This is... 190 00:10:58,365 --> 00:11:00,924 My dad's in hospital, John. 191 00:11:00,925 --> 00:11:04,444 We've got a lot on just now at this end. 192 00:11:04,445 --> 00:11:05,884 Of course. Course you do. 193 00:11:05,885 --> 00:11:08,204 Sorry. Sure. It's just... 194 00:11:08,205 --> 00:11:09,924 'Boys all right?' 195 00:11:09,925 --> 00:11:11,484 Er... boys are fine. 196 00:11:11,485 --> 00:11:13,404 OK. Bye! 197 00:11:13,405 --> 00:11:15,525 Bye. Bye! Bye-bye. 198 00:11:26,285 --> 00:11:30,204 Dad! What's for tea? Nothing. 199 00:11:30,205 --> 00:11:31,965 I don't know. 200 00:11:45,765 --> 00:11:49,925 Hi, Judith. It's me. Are you doing anything this evening? 201 00:11:50,925 --> 00:11:54,844 He said I can come home on Monday, the doctor, 202 00:11:54,845 --> 00:11:56,484 all things being equal. 203 00:11:56,485 --> 00:12:00,564 That's... amazing. 204 00:12:00,565 --> 00:12:02,884 What else has he said? 205 00:12:02,885 --> 00:12:05,805 Oh... a few dos and don'ts. Like? 206 00:12:08,045 --> 00:12:11,644 Usual. No, come on. 207 00:12:11,645 --> 00:12:14,644 No enjoying yourself. No singing, no dancing, 208 00:12:14,645 --> 00:12:16,964 no fighting, no farting. 209 00:12:16,965 --> 00:12:19,364 Different pills? 210 00:12:19,365 --> 00:12:21,085 No, no. The same. 211 00:12:22,365 --> 00:12:26,204 He told me there'd been... 212 00:12:26,205 --> 00:12:28,964 damage to the muscle. 213 00:12:28,965 --> 00:12:34,004 Yeah. Well, it's... sorted itself out. 214 00:12:34,005 --> 00:12:36,964 I will be talking to the consultant myself again, Dad, 215 00:12:36,965 --> 00:12:40,124 in case you were thinking about trying to pull the wool over 216 00:12:40,125 --> 00:12:42,484 anyone's eyes with your medical rhetoric. 217 00:12:42,485 --> 00:12:47,444 Why don't you take Caroline and see if you can't find a cup of tea somewhere? 218 00:12:47,445 --> 00:12:51,085 Good plan. We'll see you in a bit, then. 219 00:12:55,405 --> 00:12:57,844 It is nice to see you. 220 00:12:57,845 --> 00:13:00,285 Yeah, it's nice to see you as well, love. 221 00:13:01,645 --> 00:13:03,045 They do cake. 222 00:13:09,645 --> 00:13:12,524 I've been thinking. Yeah, so have I. 223 00:13:12,525 --> 00:13:15,644 Happen we should... Just get on with it, the wedding. 224 00:13:15,645 --> 00:13:18,364 Great minds. Bugger the practicalities... 225 00:13:18,365 --> 00:13:20,524 Like where we might live. Let's just... 226 00:13:20,525 --> 00:13:22,564 Book a registrar and get on with it 227 00:13:22,565 --> 00:13:25,004 and worry about everything else afterwards. 228 00:13:25,005 --> 00:13:27,604 What do you think? What about a venue? 229 00:13:27,605 --> 00:13:32,004 I don't know, I don't care. Neither do I. 230 00:13:32,005 --> 00:13:35,964 We can get married in the car park at The Dog and Duck for all I care. 231 00:13:35,965 --> 00:13:40,244 And... not tell anyone till it's all over and done with. 232 00:13:40,245 --> 00:13:41,364 Anyone? 233 00:13:41,365 --> 00:13:44,124 Anyone. 234 00:13:44,125 --> 00:13:47,524 Well, that'll get round the best man issue very nicely. 235 00:13:47,525 --> 00:13:49,244 Won't we need witnesses? 236 00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:51,564 There'll be folk passing. 237 00:13:51,565 --> 00:13:53,764 It's appealing to me. 238 00:13:53,765 --> 00:13:55,564 Yes, I can see. 239 00:13:55,565 --> 00:13:57,764 What did the consultant say? 240 00:13:57,765 --> 00:14:00,244 Just what I've said. 241 00:14:00,245 --> 00:14:02,564 Why is it that trying to get information out of a man 242 00:14:02,565 --> 00:14:05,924 is like trying to get blood out of a stone? 243 00:14:05,925 --> 00:14:07,604 I'm A1. 244 00:14:07,605 --> 00:14:10,204 Oh, you're not A1, you've had a heart attack. 245 00:14:10,205 --> 00:14:11,445 I'm A1. 246 00:14:16,805 --> 00:14:19,404 I think I was more upset when I heard about Alan 247 00:14:19,405 --> 00:14:21,684 than I was when my dad died. 248 00:14:21,685 --> 00:14:24,804 God, that's an awful thing to say. Except he had dementia, my dad. 249 00:14:24,805 --> 00:14:27,444 So in some ways... Yeah. ..it was... Yeah. ..a relief. 250 00:14:27,445 --> 00:14:31,725 Do you think people can die from a broken heart? 251 00:14:33,885 --> 00:14:36,925 I thought that was what was happening. 252 00:14:39,685 --> 00:14:42,844 Course I couldn't say that to t'consultant. He'd have laughed, 253 00:14:42,845 --> 00:14:46,604 or given you that look they do where they feel sorry for you, 254 00:14:46,605 --> 00:14:47,964 for being thick. 255 00:14:47,965 --> 00:14:50,204 You've probably never had that. 256 00:14:50,205 --> 00:14:54,324 Well... How's Kate? 257 00:14:54,325 --> 00:14:56,325 Yeah, she's... She's... 258 00:14:57,885 --> 00:15:00,925 What? It's all... 259 00:15:02,965 --> 00:15:06,924 Like everybody suddenly knows and I didn't want it to be like that. 260 00:15:06,925 --> 00:15:10,044 I mean, I don't think we know what we are yet exactly. 261 00:15:10,045 --> 00:15:13,364 And everybody's gawping at you like they're expecting you 262 00:15:13,365 --> 00:15:17,245 to make an announcement. Exactly that. Sod 'em. Let 'em deal with it. 263 00:15:18,845 --> 00:15:21,925 Yeah. Yeah. 264 00:15:28,525 --> 00:15:31,205 I need to tell you this thing. 265 00:15:32,205 --> 00:15:33,725 OK. 266 00:15:35,565 --> 00:15:38,924 You'll probably think I'm a complete dipstick when I've told you, 267 00:15:38,925 --> 00:15:42,204 but I'd rather be upfront about it and then you know, 268 00:15:42,205 --> 00:15:46,844 and then we can either move forward or not. 269 00:15:46,845 --> 00:15:51,364 OK. So, first of all... 270 00:15:51,365 --> 00:15:54,084 I don't regret it. I don't regret anything, 271 00:15:54,085 --> 00:15:56,165 I make a point of not regretting things. 272 00:15:58,405 --> 00:16:01,405 However... You've slept with John. 273 00:16:04,725 --> 00:16:07,444 I was pissed. 274 00:16:07,445 --> 00:16:09,644 It was my birthday. I felt sorry for him, 275 00:16:09,645 --> 00:16:13,205 for being such a... twat, he looked so pathetic. 276 00:16:15,765 --> 00:16:17,445 Oh, you really have slept with John? 277 00:16:27,325 --> 00:16:28,965 What was it like? 278 00:16:31,565 --> 00:16:33,325 To be honest... 279 00:16:35,045 --> 00:16:37,924 ..I don't actually remember very much about it, 280 00:16:37,925 --> 00:16:39,405 except that it happened. 281 00:16:41,125 --> 00:16:42,485 Right. 282 00:16:45,285 --> 00:16:48,084 Are you... hating me? 283 00:16:48,085 --> 00:16:49,125 No. 284 00:16:51,725 --> 00:16:54,964 I didn't want you to find out later from someone else and think there was 285 00:16:54,965 --> 00:16:56,284 any more to it than there was, 286 00:16:56,285 --> 00:16:58,364 because there wasn't, there really wasn't. 287 00:16:58,365 --> 00:17:00,444 It was one of those things you do and after you go, 288 00:17:00,445 --> 00:17:03,084 "God, why did I do that?!" 289 00:17:03,085 --> 00:17:04,685 And the truth is... 290 00:17:07,925 --> 00:17:08,965 ..I was pissed. 291 00:17:10,605 --> 00:17:12,804 I don't even fancy him. 292 00:17:12,805 --> 00:17:15,205 I mean, you know, I don't mind him, but... 293 00:17:17,685 --> 00:17:21,364 Oh, I'm daring to hope that this isn't going down too badly 294 00:17:21,365 --> 00:17:24,364 judging by the expression on your face. 295 00:17:24,365 --> 00:17:27,164 I'm pleased you told me. It won't happen again. 296 00:17:27,165 --> 00:17:29,404 No, no... you can have him. I don't want him. 297 00:17:29,405 --> 00:17:31,645 He's got a good income. I don't care. 298 00:17:34,565 --> 00:17:38,164 Do you hate me? No. 299 00:17:38,165 --> 00:17:40,604 Are you laughing at me or with me? 300 00:17:40,605 --> 00:17:46,724 I don't know, I'm just... I'm... I don't know, just laughing. 301 00:17:46,725 --> 00:17:51,764 You're thinking, "Braindead, low-life, trailer trash," aren't you? 302 00:17:51,765 --> 00:17:53,604 Yeah. 303 00:17:53,605 --> 00:17:55,525 But that's cos I'm a snotty bitch. 304 00:18:00,165 --> 00:18:02,924 It's good that you're taking it so well. 305 00:18:02,925 --> 00:18:07,644 Maybe you're in shock. Maybe the implications haven't sunk in yet. 306 00:18:07,645 --> 00:18:09,484 Are there any? 307 00:18:09,485 --> 00:18:11,204 You're not pregnant, are you? 308 00:18:11,205 --> 00:18:15,165 No! That really would thicken the plot. 309 00:18:21,285 --> 00:18:22,325 So, um... 310 00:18:23,685 --> 00:18:25,285 ..when was this? 311 00:18:26,605 --> 00:18:30,044 Night me dad and your mum drove back over to Harrogate. 312 00:18:30,045 --> 00:18:33,684 When he'd, you know, John had spilled the beans to her about you. 313 00:18:33,685 --> 00:18:34,885 Our birthday. 314 00:18:36,245 --> 00:18:37,845 God. Right. 315 00:18:39,845 --> 00:18:43,644 When I was propping Judith up in casualty. 316 00:18:43,645 --> 00:18:45,924 Were you? 317 00:18:45,925 --> 00:18:47,285 Blimey. 318 00:18:51,045 --> 00:18:53,525 "Are we cool, Vincent?" 319 00:18:56,605 --> 00:18:58,404 Is that from something? 320 00:18:58,405 --> 00:18:59,445 Pulp Fiction. 321 00:19:01,045 --> 00:19:04,885 I'm Samuel L Jackson and you're John Travolta. 322 00:19:07,205 --> 00:19:08,245 Right. 323 00:19:10,165 --> 00:19:13,324 Then we go out and shoot some students, I think. 324 00:19:13,325 --> 00:19:14,965 Unless I've misremembered. 325 00:19:18,165 --> 00:19:19,765 Blimey. 326 00:19:28,965 --> 00:19:31,284 I can't help thinking how different things would've 327 00:19:31,285 --> 00:19:33,764 been now if he hadn't pulled through. Oh, Celia! 328 00:19:33,765 --> 00:19:37,964 Well, you don't need to think about that now, do you? 329 00:19:37,965 --> 00:19:39,884 I think the world of you two. 330 00:19:39,885 --> 00:19:41,925 You both know that, don't you? Aww! 331 00:20:05,085 --> 00:20:07,364 I'll get t'kettle on. 332 00:20:07,365 --> 00:20:12,524 Where's little what's-his-name with the broken leg? 333 00:20:12,525 --> 00:20:17,564 Paul? I got shot of him. I took him to his granny's. 334 00:20:17,565 --> 00:20:19,405 Sit down, get warm. 335 00:20:23,845 --> 00:20:26,324 I might get back off home, Mum. 336 00:20:26,325 --> 00:20:28,364 Oh, I thought you were stopping. 337 00:20:28,365 --> 00:20:31,164 I've left John at home with the boys, which I'm not thrilled about. 338 00:20:31,165 --> 00:20:34,284 I don't want him to think I need him for anything, because I don't. 339 00:20:34,285 --> 00:20:36,764 He rang earlier, John. I don't know why. 340 00:20:36,765 --> 00:20:40,884 Oh, to say you'd set off. Seemed like an excuse. 341 00:20:40,885 --> 00:20:44,164 He asked to speak to Gillian. I don't know why. 342 00:20:44,165 --> 00:20:45,964 I've been thinking. 343 00:20:45,965 --> 00:20:49,684 How would you feel if, when he comes out of hospital, 344 00:20:49,685 --> 00:20:53,084 we came to live at my little flat? 345 00:20:53,085 --> 00:20:55,564 I'd feel fine about it. You see, the thing is, 346 00:20:55,565 --> 00:20:59,844 you know my dad died of a heart attack, climbing the stairs. 347 00:20:59,845 --> 00:21:02,524 The doctor told him not to and my mother, of course, said, 348 00:21:02,525 --> 00:21:06,404 "Oh, you'll be all right," and that was it. 349 00:21:06,405 --> 00:21:08,245 He'd not want to contradict her. 350 00:21:09,765 --> 00:21:11,684 He went as white as a sheet. 351 00:21:11,685 --> 00:21:17,124 Mum, it's your home. It's absolutely fine by me. 352 00:21:17,125 --> 00:21:19,044 What does Gillian think? 353 00:21:19,045 --> 00:21:23,324 See, I've no stairs, and it's nothing but stairs here, 354 00:21:23,325 --> 00:21:25,364 and steep ones at that. 355 00:21:25,365 --> 00:21:26,565 OK. 356 00:21:27,485 --> 00:21:30,404 I've not broached him with it yet, never mind Gillian. 357 00:21:30,405 --> 00:21:34,484 He might have other ideas. OK. 358 00:21:34,485 --> 00:21:35,805 Right. 359 00:21:36,925 --> 00:21:39,324 Is everybody warm enough? 360 00:21:39,325 --> 00:21:42,684 I'm going to... get, er... going. 361 00:21:42,685 --> 00:21:43,924 OK. 362 00:21:43,925 --> 00:21:48,524 I've a pile of paperwork to get through and... 363 00:21:48,525 --> 00:21:50,444 Ring me if you want anything. 364 00:21:50,445 --> 00:21:53,685 I'll see you... I'll see you out... Sure. 365 00:21:56,045 --> 00:21:58,485 See you. See ya. 366 00:22:03,925 --> 00:22:06,965 Are you all right? Yeah. 367 00:22:08,525 --> 00:22:13,165 Is there something up between you and Gillian? 368 00:22:17,405 --> 00:22:20,365 She slept with John. 369 00:22:21,405 --> 00:22:26,044 She just told me. That night, my birthday, her birthday, 370 00:22:26,045 --> 00:22:28,605 when he was over here shooting his mouth off. 371 00:22:29,805 --> 00:22:33,804 You and Alan set off over to Harrogate, I was propping 372 00:22:33,805 --> 00:22:38,684 Judith up in casualty and they ended up in bed together. 373 00:22:38,685 --> 00:22:40,884 I mean, she's told me cos she feels bad about it 374 00:22:40,885 --> 00:22:43,725 and she was drunk and she wishes it hadn't happened, but... 375 00:22:46,325 --> 00:22:50,124 I don't know. How do people do that? 376 00:22:50,125 --> 00:22:53,684 Why is everything so casual and meaningless and...? 377 00:22:53,685 --> 00:22:55,844 I can't leave. I need to be near him. 378 00:22:55,845 --> 00:22:58,604 No, I didn't... 379 00:22:58,605 --> 00:23:01,764 I know that, I don't expect you to. 380 00:23:01,765 --> 00:23:05,284 I was... Sorry, I just think I'm a little bit shocked, that's all. 381 00:23:05,285 --> 00:23:07,485 Don't say anything. No. 382 00:23:10,045 --> 00:23:12,724 Do you think before Judith, John was...? 383 00:23:12,725 --> 00:23:15,045 At it with all and sundry? 384 00:23:16,045 --> 00:23:17,725 Like your dad? 385 00:23:19,405 --> 00:23:20,965 I don't know, love. 386 00:23:26,085 --> 00:23:27,485 Ring me. Yes. 387 00:23:29,445 --> 00:23:30,764 Don't say anything. 388 00:23:30,765 --> 00:23:33,085 No, don't worry. 389 00:24:02,685 --> 00:24:04,005 Everything all right? Hmm. 390 00:24:05,845 --> 00:24:09,844 I thought I might turn in early, if it's all right? Sure. 391 00:24:09,845 --> 00:24:12,604 Course. You... do what you need to do. 392 00:24:12,605 --> 00:24:13,645 That for me? Yeah. 393 00:24:16,205 --> 00:24:18,164 Is it all right if I...? 394 00:24:18,165 --> 00:24:19,845 Course. 395 00:24:25,605 --> 00:24:27,004 Night-night, love. 396 00:24:27,005 --> 00:24:28,845 Night-night. 397 00:25:08,525 --> 00:25:10,204 Ready, Mr Buttershaw? 398 00:25:10,205 --> 00:25:13,604 I've been ready since six o'clock this morning. 399 00:25:13,605 --> 00:25:17,884 Have you heck?! Not sat there, in your coat. 400 00:25:17,885 --> 00:25:21,085 Still, wouldn't be the first time you'd kept me waiting. 401 00:25:23,325 --> 00:25:28,644 You're never going to let that drop, are you? I might do one day, 402 00:25:28,645 --> 00:25:30,485 if you play your cards right. 403 00:25:58,045 --> 00:26:01,884 I resolved, the first time it happened, that I was going to live 404 00:26:01,885 --> 00:26:05,204 life differently and I did, on the whole. 405 00:26:05,205 --> 00:26:10,005 I got in touch with you, didn't I, for instance? But now... 406 00:26:11,405 --> 00:26:15,924 Now you're going to take things steady. No. God, no. 407 00:26:15,925 --> 00:26:19,204 Now I'm going to really start living. 408 00:26:19,205 --> 00:26:22,244 What do you think I'm doing sat up here? 409 00:26:22,245 --> 00:26:26,245 Well, you know what the consultant just said. Oh, bugger that. 410 00:26:27,645 --> 00:26:30,644 OK. So what've you got planned? 411 00:26:30,645 --> 00:26:34,924 Anything. All sorts. Such as? 412 00:26:34,925 --> 00:26:39,925 Have you ever fancied skiing? No. Have you? 413 00:26:41,925 --> 00:26:44,364 Oh, you! 414 00:26:44,365 --> 00:26:46,764 Never! Good. 415 00:26:46,765 --> 00:26:49,284 Well, that's that dealt with, then. 416 00:26:49,285 --> 00:26:53,484 We used to come up here on bikes. 417 00:26:53,485 --> 00:26:56,564 Me and Maurice and Harry and Joe Riley. 418 00:26:56,565 --> 00:27:00,324 You could get all t'way to Greetland from top o' Barkisland 419 00:27:00,325 --> 00:27:02,004 without pedalling once. 420 00:27:02,005 --> 00:27:06,724 I know you could because... It were like floating through the air. 421 00:27:06,725 --> 00:27:09,764 Because me and Eileen and Doreen Wilkinson 422 00:27:09,765 --> 00:27:15,244 and our Muriel used to do just the same. Did you? Yeah, yeah. 423 00:27:15,245 --> 00:27:18,564 I always used to think you were a bit smitten with Joe Riley. 424 00:27:18,565 --> 00:27:20,244 Joe?! 425 00:27:20,245 --> 00:27:24,124 No. Although he was very good-looking. 426 00:27:24,125 --> 00:27:28,124 I always thought he had a look of Errol Flynn, but clever. 427 00:27:28,125 --> 00:27:30,564 He went to work for NASA, didn't he? He did! 428 00:27:30,565 --> 00:27:34,244 He were made a Fellow of the Royal Society, then off he went 429 00:27:34,245 --> 00:27:40,604 to Altadena, California. Brain drain. He were my best man... 430 00:27:40,605 --> 00:27:45,084 when Eileen and I got wed. Oh. Do you keep in touch? 431 00:27:45,085 --> 00:27:51,724 We did. Every Christmas, and the occasional letter in-between. 432 00:27:51,725 --> 00:27:53,004 He popped over once or twice 433 00:27:53,005 --> 00:27:56,564 to see his mother, but we always caught up. 434 00:27:56,565 --> 00:28:00,965 I always fancied popping over there, but it never happened. 435 00:28:02,805 --> 00:28:05,125 He had Parkinson's at finish. 436 00:28:08,645 --> 00:28:11,684 We came up here to scatter my dad's ashes, 437 00:28:11,685 --> 00:28:14,284 me and me mum. 438 00:28:14,285 --> 00:28:19,244 We drove over from Sheffield and we had Caroline in the pushchair. 439 00:28:19,245 --> 00:28:20,485 1969. 440 00:28:23,365 --> 00:28:26,524 He loved up here, me dad. 441 00:28:26,525 --> 00:28:28,444 It was a right farce. 442 00:28:28,445 --> 00:28:30,644 We thought it would be like powder, 443 00:28:30,645 --> 00:28:33,324 but it wasn't, it was more like grit, 444 00:28:33,325 --> 00:28:37,284 granules, and it got everywhere. 445 00:28:37,285 --> 00:28:40,644 We just couldn't get rid of it. Him. 446 00:28:40,645 --> 00:28:44,964 We hadn't thought it through. Well, she hadn't, me mother. 447 00:28:44,965 --> 00:28:50,564 And we hadn't got permission. Well, we didn't know you needed it. 448 00:28:50,565 --> 00:28:52,885 Perhaps you didn't then. I don't know. 449 00:28:55,525 --> 00:28:59,325 I don't know what my mum and dad would've thought about me and you. 450 00:29:01,085 --> 00:29:04,444 Actually, I do. They'd have been over the moon. 451 00:29:04,445 --> 00:29:06,685 They'd have been thrilled to bits with you. 452 00:29:08,725 --> 00:29:11,245 Do you fancy a pint? 453 00:29:13,565 --> 00:29:15,844 It's only just gone half-past 11! 454 00:29:15,845 --> 00:29:18,124 You've only been out of hospital half an hour! 455 00:29:18,125 --> 00:29:20,844 So what? You know damn well so what. 456 00:29:20,845 --> 00:29:27,084 Do you fancy popping over to the Registry Office first, then? 457 00:29:27,085 --> 00:29:31,804 Are we serious, about not telling anyone 458 00:29:31,805 --> 00:29:36,085 till it's all over and done with? Well, I am, yeah. 459 00:30:15,325 --> 00:30:19,525 So that's a fortnight tomorrow at 11am. 460 00:30:21,445 --> 00:30:23,365 Shall I put that on a card for you? 461 00:30:54,245 --> 00:30:56,444 Well, it's a good job you texted me 462 00:30:56,445 --> 00:30:59,204 or I'd have been wondering where you were. 463 00:30:59,205 --> 00:31:03,684 Is it wise to go gallivanting when you've only just been discharged? 464 00:31:03,685 --> 00:31:08,284 I just wanted to see Ladstone Rock and then we fancied a pint. 465 00:31:08,285 --> 00:31:13,164 Oh, so you went via Aberdeen? That's right. 466 00:31:13,165 --> 00:31:16,284 Have you set a date? Sorry? For the wedding? 467 00:31:16,285 --> 00:31:19,804 Oh, no, love. No. 468 00:31:19,805 --> 00:31:23,124 Alan needs to concentrate on getting fit again first 469 00:31:23,125 --> 00:31:25,684 before we start thinking of anything like that. 470 00:31:25,685 --> 00:31:27,404 Shall we get t'kettle on? 471 00:31:27,405 --> 00:31:31,365 And then me and Celia have got something to run past you. 472 00:31:35,565 --> 00:31:38,844 Harrogate? I've no stairs. 473 00:31:38,845 --> 00:31:42,564 And you're out on the farm all day, or down at the shop, 474 00:31:42,565 --> 00:31:45,044 whereas I can see to him 24/7. 475 00:31:45,045 --> 00:31:46,485 That's what I'm thinking. 476 00:31:48,125 --> 00:31:50,244 Well, that's very kind of you, but... 477 00:31:50,245 --> 00:31:52,404 And it's not like it's for ever. 478 00:31:52,405 --> 00:31:56,004 I mean, we do intend to buy. Eventually. 479 00:31:56,005 --> 00:31:58,604 OK. And soon. 480 00:31:58,605 --> 00:32:02,084 And when we do, it'll more than likely be round here. 481 00:32:02,085 --> 00:32:04,004 Well, we've not discussed that yet. 482 00:32:04,005 --> 00:32:05,364 No, no, but... 483 00:32:05,365 --> 00:32:09,924 And it's not a million miles away, Harrogate, is it? 484 00:32:09,925 --> 00:32:11,204 No, it's not but... 485 00:32:11,205 --> 00:32:15,964 And you'd be more than welcome, any time you fancied, to pop over. 486 00:32:15,965 --> 00:32:18,804 It is very nice, the house 487 00:32:18,805 --> 00:32:20,524 and Celia's little flat. 488 00:32:20,525 --> 00:32:23,365 I'm sure it is, Dad. I just... 489 00:32:26,445 --> 00:32:29,124 So when were you thinking of... 490 00:32:29,125 --> 00:32:30,644 Tomorrow. 491 00:32:30,645 --> 00:32:35,204 Tomorrow? Does Caroline know...? 492 00:32:35,205 --> 00:32:37,404 She's fine about it. 493 00:32:37,405 --> 00:32:38,725 I see. 494 00:32:39,965 --> 00:32:43,004 So... 495 00:32:43,005 --> 00:32:46,125 Well, it just seems a bit sudden. 496 00:32:47,485 --> 00:32:48,884 But... Well, 497 00:32:48,885 --> 00:32:50,444 yeah, if it's what you want. 498 00:32:50,445 --> 00:32:53,324 I thought it'd be a weight off your mind. 499 00:32:53,325 --> 00:32:54,924 You'll be 60 miles away. 500 00:32:54,925 --> 00:32:58,444 Oh, no. It's actually more like 40. 501 00:32:58,445 --> 00:33:00,004 40, 60. 502 00:33:00,005 --> 00:33:02,564 He'll be in good hands. 503 00:33:02,565 --> 00:33:04,444 Yeah, I understand that, Celia. 504 00:33:04,445 --> 00:33:08,964 You'll have to pretend I'm on holiday. 505 00:33:08,965 --> 00:33:11,244 Right. 506 00:33:11,245 --> 00:33:12,804 But... 507 00:33:12,805 --> 00:33:16,324 how about if I popped over with you? 508 00:33:16,325 --> 00:33:19,604 Just quickly, just tomorrow, just to make sure you're... Yeah. 509 00:33:19,605 --> 00:33:21,844 ..settled in all right and everything's... 510 00:33:21,845 --> 00:33:24,284 Sure. 511 00:33:24,285 --> 00:33:28,605 Right. I'll get the kettle on. 512 00:33:34,165 --> 00:33:39,564 I've got my new hat. So that's that bit covered. 513 00:33:39,565 --> 00:33:42,564 Something old, something new... 514 00:33:42,565 --> 00:33:44,764 Something old we've not got. 515 00:33:44,765 --> 00:33:46,764 Well, we're both old. 516 00:33:46,765 --> 00:33:50,525 Are we? Well, you are, I'm not. 517 00:33:52,525 --> 00:33:56,284 I started counting backwards when I got to 36. 518 00:33:56,285 --> 00:33:59,684 So how old does that make you now then? 519 00:33:59,685 --> 00:34:01,524 Minus three. 520 00:34:01,525 --> 00:34:03,124 Fancy. 521 00:34:03,125 --> 00:34:07,204 We had a very interesting experience in 1988, 522 00:34:07,205 --> 00:34:11,284 when me and our Caroline were both 22. 523 00:34:11,285 --> 00:34:14,244 That must have taken some explaining. 524 00:34:14,245 --> 00:34:16,124 Not really. 525 00:34:16,125 --> 00:34:19,364 Something borrowed... 526 00:34:19,365 --> 00:34:25,924 I could borrow a bow tie off Maurice. Then I'd be very dapper. 527 00:34:25,925 --> 00:34:28,604 You could and you would, but then he'd want to know why you were 528 00:34:28,605 --> 00:34:30,844 borrowing it. You know what a nosy old bugger he is. 529 00:34:30,845 --> 00:34:34,284 I could lie. I could say I'd been invited to a cocktail party. 530 00:34:34,285 --> 00:34:36,324 In Manhattan. 531 00:34:36,325 --> 00:34:37,804 Mmm, he'd believe that. 532 00:34:37,805 --> 00:34:40,404 Only he might want to come with me. 533 00:34:40,405 --> 00:34:43,604 Tell him to sod off. OK. 534 00:34:43,605 --> 00:34:45,764 Something blue. 535 00:34:45,765 --> 00:34:48,684 A mucky magazine? 536 00:34:48,685 --> 00:34:51,164 Have you got any? 537 00:34:51,165 --> 00:34:53,444 No. Have you? 538 00:34:53,445 --> 00:34:55,765 Oh, yeah, got loads! 539 00:35:00,165 --> 00:35:02,005 No, I haven't. 540 00:35:53,605 --> 00:35:54,965 She slept with John. 541 00:35:56,405 --> 00:35:59,284 Who? Gillian. 542 00:35:59,285 --> 00:36:01,404 That night when we drove over here, 543 00:36:01,405 --> 00:36:04,604 and he'd been there shooting his mouth off about Caroline 544 00:36:04,605 --> 00:36:06,044 batting for the other side... 545 00:36:06,045 --> 00:36:08,084 Slept with him?! 546 00:36:08,085 --> 00:36:10,245 Had... sex with him. 547 00:36:11,565 --> 00:36:12,804 How do you know? 548 00:36:12,805 --> 00:36:14,724 Caroline told me. 549 00:36:14,725 --> 00:36:16,164 Well, how does she know? 550 00:36:16,165 --> 00:36:18,684 Gillian. Told her, apparently. 551 00:36:18,685 --> 00:36:21,484 What for? 552 00:36:21,485 --> 00:36:26,365 Well, because... I don't know. I think because she regretted it. 553 00:36:27,765 --> 00:36:32,725 I don't know why I've told you. Well, except it's bothered me. 554 00:36:34,365 --> 00:36:37,164 Sorry. I don't want to burden you with it. 555 00:36:37,165 --> 00:36:39,644 It's not... I'm not... 556 00:36:39,645 --> 00:36:43,684 I'm just a bit befuddled with it myself really. 557 00:36:43,685 --> 00:36:48,764 And plus, I don't want to see her get hurt. Gillian. 558 00:36:48,765 --> 00:36:53,725 God! He's a bugger is John. 559 00:36:58,605 --> 00:37:03,724 Gillian's coming! Gillian? Yes! 560 00:37:03,725 --> 00:37:06,124 And Kate's here. 561 00:37:06,125 --> 00:37:09,404 What's...? What's Gillian coming here for? 562 00:37:09,405 --> 00:37:13,164 Would you like some tea? Ooh. Hi, John. 563 00:37:13,165 --> 00:37:15,404 What's Gillian coming here for? 564 00:37:15,405 --> 00:37:19,964 Alan's moving into my mum's to recuperate and I think she wants to see him settled in. 565 00:37:19,965 --> 00:37:22,684 So, is... is she staying... long? 566 00:37:22,685 --> 00:37:25,444 I don't know. You'll have to ask her yourself. 567 00:37:25,445 --> 00:37:27,844 Oh, and Kate's moving in. 568 00:37:27,845 --> 00:37:29,684 I'll get my things out of the car. 569 00:37:29,685 --> 00:37:33,444 Lawrence, can you help Kate with her things? 570 00:37:33,445 --> 00:37:35,284 That's... You can't expect me... 571 00:37:35,285 --> 00:37:37,964 She's got her own house, what does she want to move in here for? 572 00:37:37,965 --> 00:37:41,044 John, after I came back here on Saturday night 573 00:37:41,045 --> 00:37:44,124 and found what I found, I'm amazed you could begin to imagine that 574 00:37:44,125 --> 00:37:46,884 you have anything to say at all about what other people do. 575 00:37:46,885 --> 00:37:49,044 Judith... Judith needs help. 576 00:37:49,045 --> 00:37:51,924 Judith and I are not an item. Well, you could've fooled me! 577 00:37:51,925 --> 00:37:56,604 I will not be made to feel like a sodding gooseberry in my own house. 578 00:37:56,605 --> 00:37:59,605 That-that-that was... You have nothing to say. 579 00:38:04,725 --> 00:38:06,445 What time are they getting here? 580 00:38:21,605 --> 00:38:23,364 Blimey. 581 00:38:23,365 --> 00:38:27,165 My little apartment's round the back, Gillian. 582 00:38:29,485 --> 00:38:31,725 Done all right for yourself here, Dad, eh? 583 00:38:33,685 --> 00:38:35,164 What's up? 584 00:38:35,165 --> 00:38:39,324 I thought we were plumbing depths with Susan Jatri's lad, but John? 585 00:38:39,325 --> 00:38:42,044 He's practically your brother-in-law. 586 00:38:42,045 --> 00:38:44,844 And I thought you told me you and Robbie were more or less an item? 587 00:38:44,845 --> 00:38:46,084 How did...? Who...? 588 00:38:46,085 --> 00:38:48,764 Celia told me. Caroline told her. 589 00:38:48,765 --> 00:38:52,284 You... I told Caroline because I felt bad about it. 590 00:38:52,285 --> 00:38:57,044 I was pissed, it was my birthday. Me and Robbie are... 591 00:38:57,045 --> 00:38:59,484 Are we going in? Yeah, let me. 592 00:38:59,485 --> 00:39:01,485 I'll lead the way. 593 00:39:03,085 --> 00:39:06,924 It didn't mean anything. It was rubbish, it was ridiculous. 594 00:39:06,925 --> 00:39:09,005 I just felt sorry for him. 595 00:39:10,885 --> 00:39:13,124 You're a... 596 00:39:13,125 --> 00:39:15,525 What am I? Come on! Don't hold back! 597 00:39:16,925 --> 00:39:18,644 ..a pillock! 598 00:39:18,645 --> 00:39:22,884 Oh, OK. I thought you were going to say something worse. I was. 599 00:39:22,885 --> 00:39:24,165 Yeah! Whatever. 600 00:39:25,885 --> 00:39:28,644 I've put my things in your bedroom. 601 00:39:28,645 --> 00:39:31,644 Is that...? Of course it is. 602 00:39:31,645 --> 00:39:33,045 How permanent is this? 603 00:39:34,965 --> 00:39:38,084 We need to sit down and have the conversation properly, 604 00:39:38,085 --> 00:39:43,284 and not when we've been rushed into it, but it's... Yeah. If... 605 00:39:43,285 --> 00:39:49,244 If... Yeah. If it's what you want. 606 00:39:49,245 --> 00:39:50,685 Do you need to ask? 607 00:39:55,365 --> 00:39:59,324 Hello? 'We're back, we've arrived.' 608 00:39:59,325 --> 00:40:02,764 Good! They've arrived. I'll pop round. 609 00:40:02,765 --> 00:40:04,804 There's something I need to tell you. 610 00:40:04,805 --> 00:40:06,204 'Right. Ta-ta.' 611 00:40:06,205 --> 00:40:08,765 She's popping round. 612 00:40:12,085 --> 00:40:13,485 What's up? 613 00:40:15,325 --> 00:40:17,964 It's just a disappointment, isn't it? 614 00:40:17,965 --> 00:40:19,804 An ongoing disappointment. 615 00:40:19,805 --> 00:40:24,044 And for the record, he is not my brother-in-law because, A, 616 00:40:24,045 --> 00:40:29,404 you're not married yet, and two - him and Caroline are getting divorced. 617 00:40:29,405 --> 00:40:33,284 Ipso-facto, QED, NOT my brother-in-law. 618 00:40:33,285 --> 00:40:35,364 I said not to say anything. 619 00:40:35,365 --> 00:40:36,924 Aye. Well, I did. 620 00:40:36,925 --> 00:40:41,364 Can we all just get it into our little heads that I regret it 621 00:40:41,365 --> 00:40:44,844 and it won't happen again? Would you like that written down? 622 00:40:44,845 --> 00:40:46,604 In triplicate? 623 00:40:46,605 --> 00:40:49,805 What for? It wouldn't mean owt. 624 00:40:52,205 --> 00:40:54,324 Dad, I'm going to get upset. 625 00:40:54,325 --> 00:40:56,444 Well, what do you expect? 626 00:40:56,445 --> 00:40:59,165 She were pregnant when she were 15. 627 00:41:01,885 --> 00:41:06,325 Dad! Broke Eileen's heart. Perhaps you didn't know that. 628 00:41:08,405 --> 00:41:12,524 Hi! Alan! 629 00:41:12,525 --> 00:41:15,485 Hello, love. How was your journey? 630 00:41:18,525 --> 00:41:24,125 It was fine. Good! Is everything...? 631 00:41:25,165 --> 00:41:27,964 I'll put the kettle on in a minute. I'm cooking for everyone. 632 00:41:27,965 --> 00:41:30,044 It'll be about half an hour if that's... 633 00:41:30,045 --> 00:41:32,045 Perfect, love. Smashing. 634 00:41:33,885 --> 00:41:38,684 So, I just need to... tell you something. 635 00:41:38,685 --> 00:41:42,124 Kate's here. You're going to have to bear with me. I didn't plan this 636 00:41:42,125 --> 00:41:45,764 exactly to coincide... Only, when I got back here 637 00:41:45,765 --> 00:41:47,405 on Saturday night, Judith was here. 638 00:41:56,285 --> 00:41:57,964 Ahh! 639 00:41:57,965 --> 00:41:59,964 Oh! 640 00:41:59,965 --> 00:42:03,644 Oh, Jesus! 641 00:42:03,645 --> 00:42:10,804 Shit! I thought... He said you were in... Where is it? Huddersfield. 642 00:42:10,805 --> 00:42:14,404 Halifax. 643 00:42:14,405 --> 00:42:16,924 What's the matter? What's happened? 644 00:42:16,925 --> 00:42:20,444 You've not fallen down the stairs again have you, you silly cow? 645 00:42:20,445 --> 00:42:24,284 Caroline's here. What? Caroline's here! What? 646 00:42:24,285 --> 00:42:26,484 CAROLINE'S... Caroline's in Halifax. 647 00:42:26,485 --> 00:42:28,364 Where are the boys? 648 00:42:28,365 --> 00:42:31,604 They're around. What are you doing here? You're supposed to be... 649 00:42:31,605 --> 00:42:34,484 They've been playing music really loud and making loads of noise, 650 00:42:34,485 --> 00:42:38,764 and they were throwing stuff around in the kitchen and then they went upstairs in your bedroom! 651 00:42:38,765 --> 00:42:43,364 That kid needs to lighten up. We thought you were going to be away all night. 652 00:42:43,365 --> 00:42:46,404 Oh, God, don't snivel! It's hardly that... bad. 653 00:42:46,405 --> 00:42:48,404 Get your coats on, get into my car. 654 00:42:48,405 --> 00:42:51,324 I'll be back in the morning and I don't care how you do it, 655 00:42:51,325 --> 00:42:53,484 but that kitchen better be as spotless as it was 656 00:42:53,485 --> 00:42:56,124 when I left here this afternoon. 657 00:42:56,125 --> 00:42:58,244 Oi, you have friends round, 658 00:42:58,245 --> 00:43:00,324 I have friends round. 659 00:43:00,325 --> 00:43:02,484 You've traumatised our children. 660 00:43:02,485 --> 00:43:05,924 I have? What about you? You've scarred them for life! 661 00:43:05,925 --> 00:43:09,244 Do you know what? I'm actually starting to feel a bit queasy. 662 00:43:09,245 --> 00:43:12,204 This is nothing compared to what you're actively 663 00:43:12,205 --> 00:43:14,604 inflicting on them, you mad old dyke! 664 00:43:14,605 --> 00:43:17,964 And bollocks to you with your "this kitchen better be spotless". 665 00:43:17,965 --> 00:43:21,444 I don't know why I'm bothering to remind you, but I will. 666 00:43:21,445 --> 00:43:26,044 This house... This house was paid for almost entirely with money 667 00:43:26,045 --> 00:43:28,685 I earned when I was on the bestseller list! So f... 668 00:43:33,405 --> 00:43:35,884 I'll see you in the morning. Yeah. 669 00:43:35,885 --> 00:43:38,044 Whatever. 670 00:43:38,045 --> 00:43:42,044 So, I took the boys round to Kate's for the night 671 00:43:42,045 --> 00:43:46,164 and, um... John was pretty appalled, to be fair to him, 672 00:43:46,165 --> 00:43:47,844 on Sunday morning. 673 00:43:47,845 --> 00:43:49,604 He had tried to tidy the kitchen up, 674 00:43:49,605 --> 00:43:52,364 but he wasn't really in any fit state to stand up 675 00:43:52,365 --> 00:43:56,204 for any length of time until the early evening, so I had to help him. 676 00:43:56,205 --> 00:43:59,884 Then I asked him if he would move out, 677 00:43:59,885 --> 00:44:01,964 so that we can all move on with our lives, 678 00:44:01,965 --> 00:44:04,324 but he's still refusing to do that. 679 00:44:04,325 --> 00:44:06,324 So I have asked Kate to move in 680 00:44:06,325 --> 00:44:09,964 in the hope that, at some point, he will get the message. 681 00:44:09,965 --> 00:44:13,885 So that's why Kate's here, OK? 682 00:44:23,245 --> 00:44:25,925 Where's Caroline? Next door. 683 00:44:28,165 --> 00:44:31,564 Is... Gillian staying for supper? 684 00:44:31,565 --> 00:44:32,805 I don't know. 685 00:44:36,005 --> 00:44:37,564 What are you... cooking? 686 00:44:37,565 --> 00:44:42,044 It's... Erm... I don't know. Caroline's in charge, I'm just... 687 00:44:42,045 --> 00:44:44,364 What's she doing next door? I... 688 00:44:44,365 --> 00:44:48,645 God, I can't stand this! This is my house, I live here. 689 00:44:50,605 --> 00:44:53,844 Is she...? She'd better not be. What? 690 00:44:53,845 --> 00:44:57,004 Telling people things about me. 691 00:44:57,005 --> 00:44:59,644 I'm not going to be made to feel like... 692 00:44:59,645 --> 00:45:02,844 whatever in my own house. 693 00:45:02,845 --> 00:45:06,245 I...have no opinion on that. 694 00:45:11,485 --> 00:45:14,124 He's a mess is John. 695 00:45:14,125 --> 00:45:17,045 As long as nobody's under any illusions. 696 00:45:19,085 --> 00:45:22,684 Caroline, I'm going to get off home. 697 00:45:22,685 --> 00:45:23,725 OK. 698 00:45:26,965 --> 00:45:29,484 Ring me if you want anything. 699 00:45:29,485 --> 00:45:31,124 Right. 700 00:45:31,125 --> 00:45:33,805 Right. Thanks, Celia. 701 00:45:35,005 --> 00:45:36,365 OK, love. 702 00:45:43,245 --> 00:45:45,165 I'll... 703 00:45:52,285 --> 00:45:56,245 Gillian? Sorry, I need to get home. 704 00:45:57,925 --> 00:46:02,924 What's the matter? Nothing. Come inside. No. No, I'll... 705 00:46:02,925 --> 00:46:05,324 Well... What's happened? 706 00:46:05,325 --> 00:46:08,084 It's fine. It's fine. I'm just leaving him here, 707 00:46:08,085 --> 00:46:10,684 60, 40 miles from home and... 708 00:46:10,685 --> 00:46:13,764 She'll look after him. I know that. 709 00:46:13,765 --> 00:46:17,564 And I'll keep an eye on everything. I know. I know you will. 710 00:46:17,565 --> 00:46:21,484 You can come here any time you like. I know. I know. 711 00:46:21,485 --> 00:46:23,245 Why did you tell your mum? 712 00:46:26,125 --> 00:46:27,964 Is that what's...? 713 00:46:27,965 --> 00:46:32,445 She's told me dad and he's... Did she? I'm sorry, I just... 714 00:46:33,725 --> 00:46:39,564 I just couldn't... Just couldn't... 715 00:46:39,565 --> 00:46:43,924 No, don't. It's all my own stupid fault anyway, isn't it? 716 00:46:43,925 --> 00:46:45,845 Is he upset? 717 00:46:47,125 --> 00:46:49,844 Oh, God. I'm sorry. 718 00:46:49,845 --> 00:46:50,885 No, it's... 719 00:46:53,845 --> 00:46:57,004 He said something about me mum. 720 00:46:57,005 --> 00:46:58,045 That's all. 721 00:46:59,965 --> 00:47:01,765 I broke her heart apparently. 722 00:47:03,045 --> 00:47:04,485 When I was 15. 723 00:47:06,045 --> 00:47:09,164 Well, I did. I know I did. 724 00:47:09,165 --> 00:47:10,364 I got pregnant. 725 00:47:10,365 --> 00:47:14,524 I had to leave school at the time. You know, I went back... 726 00:47:14,525 --> 00:47:18,005 later to do my A-levels, but... it never worked out, so... 727 00:47:20,325 --> 00:47:23,724 All very disappointing for them. 728 00:47:23,725 --> 00:47:26,445 So, yup, that's me. 729 00:47:27,405 --> 00:47:28,764 You had a baby? 730 00:47:28,765 --> 00:47:31,805 No! No. A-Abortion. 731 00:47:33,365 --> 00:47:37,204 Sorry. I am sorry. I don't know why I told her, I just... 732 00:47:37,205 --> 00:47:41,124 had it on my brain and, you know, she's me mum, and... 733 00:47:41,125 --> 00:47:43,724 Well, it'll blow over. Yeah. Will it? 734 00:47:43,725 --> 00:47:47,245 Just bad timing. With his... Yeah. Sorry. 735 00:47:49,165 --> 00:47:51,284 I'll get off. I'll ring you. 736 00:47:51,285 --> 00:47:54,004 I wasn't accusing you. I just... I'm sorry. 737 00:47:54,005 --> 00:47:56,165 Not your fault. Really not. 738 00:48:03,365 --> 00:48:04,805 Why am I apologising? 739 00:48:09,165 --> 00:48:10,925 Sanctimonious b... 740 00:48:38,125 --> 00:48:41,644 Gillian! Shit! 741 00:48:41,645 --> 00:48:43,044 I need to talk to you. 742 00:48:43,045 --> 00:48:45,524 Yeah, well, I don't need to talk to you! 743 00:48:45,525 --> 00:48:49,884 In fact, right now... I can't... ..you're the last... 744 00:48:49,885 --> 00:48:52,244 You can't treat people like this. 745 00:48:52,245 --> 00:48:55,924 You can't ignore my texts and hang up on me on the phone. 746 00:48:55,925 --> 00:48:59,404 Can you get out of my Land Rover, please? We had sex. 747 00:48:59,405 --> 00:49:02,484 Yes, we did. And, boy, am I paying for it now?! 748 00:49:02,485 --> 00:49:05,364 You came onto me. Not! So forgive me... Yes, you did. You... 749 00:49:05,365 --> 00:49:08,564 I tentatively explained that I had feelings for you. 750 00:49:08,565 --> 00:49:11,404 You said, "Shall we go upstairs?" So forgive me for thinking that 751 00:49:11,405 --> 00:49:14,244 we'd embarked upon some sort of relationship. OK. Right. Right. 752 00:49:14,245 --> 00:49:17,004 So, please, can you explain why, Saturday afternoon, 753 00:49:17,005 --> 00:49:18,524 you're on the phone saying, 754 00:49:18,525 --> 00:49:22,244 "I think I might be a little bit in love with you, Gillian," and then, 755 00:49:22,245 --> 00:49:26,404 the same night, you're here, in bed with Judith apparently, 756 00:49:26,405 --> 00:49:28,644 who you claim to hate. 757 00:49:28,645 --> 00:49:31,924 She told you. Caroline. She... Yes! Well, isn't it obvious? 758 00:49:31,925 --> 00:49:34,404 Not to me! I'm floundering. 759 00:49:34,405 --> 00:49:37,844 What? You won't speak to me, she's decided she's a dyke, 760 00:49:37,845 --> 00:49:39,244 the boys think I'm ridiculous. 761 00:49:39,245 --> 00:49:42,564 Oh, no. They don't. Do they? 762 00:49:42,565 --> 00:49:45,804 I've got nothing. She's moved her insipid little girlfriend in 763 00:49:45,805 --> 00:49:48,404 and her mad mother... Oi, steady on. 764 00:49:48,405 --> 00:49:54,004 I bought that house and now I'm the one who... Oh, shit! 765 00:49:54,005 --> 00:49:55,884 I'm going to have to knock to get back in. 766 00:49:55,885 --> 00:49:58,284 Aw-w! Bless. 767 00:49:58,285 --> 00:50:00,684 Yeah, it's all so funny, isn't it? 768 00:50:00,685 --> 00:50:02,204 Sorry. 769 00:50:02,205 --> 00:50:05,804 I'm all over the place, I can't think straight, and then... God! 770 00:50:05,805 --> 00:50:10,124 I end up in another tawdry mess with that ridiculous woman in front of the children. 771 00:50:10,125 --> 00:50:13,924 You know, people commit suicide with less than this eating away inside their brain. 772 00:50:13,925 --> 00:50:16,444 Is it... that bad? 773 00:50:16,445 --> 00:50:18,085 My publisher's dropped me. 774 00:50:19,565 --> 00:50:21,085 Why? 775 00:50:23,405 --> 00:50:27,445 It's being brewing for a while. I got an e-mail last week. 776 00:50:29,685 --> 00:50:34,644 Well... is there someone you can talk to about it? 777 00:50:34,645 --> 00:50:37,564 No, not really. It's not something you want to tell to just anyone. 778 00:50:37,565 --> 00:50:40,644 And my agent... he's not returned my calls, so that's... 779 00:50:40,645 --> 00:50:43,204 You see, before, Caroline would've been really... 780 00:50:43,205 --> 00:50:44,884 good about something like that. 781 00:50:44,885 --> 00:50:47,084 She'd have put it in a context. 782 00:50:47,085 --> 00:50:49,684 She'd have thrown a light on it that... 783 00:50:49,685 --> 00:50:52,604 She can be a really good person to have in your corner. 784 00:50:52,605 --> 00:50:55,925 Yeah, well, shame you were unfaithful to her. 785 00:50:57,325 --> 00:50:58,484 Sorry. 786 00:50:58,485 --> 00:51:00,845 Everything's just such a mess. 787 00:51:02,285 --> 00:51:06,485 What did you mean when you said, "And, boy, am I paying for it now"? 788 00:51:07,525 --> 00:51:10,644 Well... OK. They all know. 789 00:51:10,645 --> 00:51:13,645 That we... Do they? 790 00:51:15,565 --> 00:51:20,764 Do they? Well, is that... 791 00:51:20,765 --> 00:51:24,484 such a bad thing? Couldn't we...? 792 00:51:24,485 --> 00:51:29,844 No. It was a mistake, it should never have happened. 793 00:51:29,845 --> 00:51:32,444 I have to go, John. 794 00:51:32,445 --> 00:51:34,724 I'm sorry about your publisher 795 00:51:34,725 --> 00:51:38,044 but, you know, we've all got crosses to bear. 796 00:51:38,045 --> 00:51:40,684 I don't know how much longer I can afford to keep the farm going, 797 00:51:40,685 --> 00:51:43,164 way things are at the moment. Why? 798 00:51:43,165 --> 00:51:45,764 Oh... money. Really? 799 00:51:45,765 --> 00:51:46,885 That's my problem. 800 00:51:48,045 --> 00:51:51,164 So... what if I... popped over 801 00:51:51,165 --> 00:51:53,324 some time? Would that be... 802 00:51:53,325 --> 00:51:55,484 completely...? 803 00:51:55,485 --> 00:51:57,564 I'm seeing Robbie. 804 00:51:57,565 --> 00:51:59,204 I thought you hated Robbie. 805 00:51:59,205 --> 00:52:01,125 Yeah, I thought you hated Judith. 806 00:52:27,765 --> 00:52:31,885 What are you doing outside? I... Does it matter? 807 00:52:38,125 --> 00:52:40,124 Do you want something to eat? 808 00:52:40,125 --> 00:52:43,245 Is there enough? You'll have to find a chair. 809 00:52:59,965 --> 00:53:01,964 Hello. 810 00:53:01,965 --> 00:53:03,964 Hi, Alan. How's...? Are you...? 811 00:53:03,965 --> 00:53:06,924 Oh, fighting fit. 812 00:53:06,925 --> 00:53:09,844 Good. That's good. That's... 813 00:53:09,845 --> 00:53:12,204 Would you like...? 814 00:53:12,205 --> 00:53:14,005 Well, perhaps just a small one. 815 00:53:18,045 --> 00:53:19,205 I'll get you a glass. 816 00:53:37,045 --> 00:53:38,085 Come by! 817 00:53:39,685 --> 00:53:41,165 Away! Away! 818 00:53:54,885 --> 00:53:56,605 Can you sit down, please? 819 00:53:58,485 --> 00:54:01,045 On you go. Come on. 820 00:54:15,725 --> 00:54:16,765 In you go. 821 00:54:44,405 --> 00:54:46,325 Oh, sorry. 822 00:54:47,885 --> 00:54:49,125 Oh, I've got to take this. 823 00:54:54,565 --> 00:54:57,484 Hello, Gillian. 'You busy?' 824 00:54:57,485 --> 00:54:59,364 I'm in a meeting. 825 00:54:59,365 --> 00:55:02,044 All right. Well, I'm sorry, but this might be urgent. 826 00:55:02,045 --> 00:55:03,884 Why? 827 00:55:03,885 --> 00:55:05,284 Where's me dad and Celia? 828 00:55:05,285 --> 00:55:08,764 Well, erm... at home as far as I know. 829 00:55:08,765 --> 00:55:11,085 They... So, you've... 830 00:55:12,405 --> 00:55:14,884 So no-one's been... 831 00:55:14,885 --> 00:55:19,564 I've found a card, behind a cushion, 832 00:55:19,565 --> 00:55:24,764 'on our settee. It's from Calderdale Registry Office. 833 00:55:24,765 --> 00:55:27,244 'An appointment card. They've got an appointment' 834 00:55:27,245 --> 00:55:30,804 to get married at...11 o'clock this morning. 835 00:55:30,805 --> 00:55:32,084 You're kidding! 836 00:55:32,085 --> 00:55:34,164 Have they...? 837 00:55:34,165 --> 00:55:36,124 Have they not said anything to you? 838 00:55:36,125 --> 00:55:37,564 'No.' 839 00:55:37,565 --> 00:55:39,124 Er... no. 840 00:55:39,125 --> 00:55:42,924 I've tried his mobile, I've tried hers. 841 00:55:42,925 --> 00:55:44,724 I can be there if you can. 842 00:55:44,725 --> 00:55:48,884 I'll probably overtake them on the M62. The little buggers! 843 00:55:48,885 --> 00:55:53,044 But... presumably, they don't want us there 844 00:55:53,045 --> 00:55:56,524 and, presumably, that's the point. 845 00:55:56,525 --> 00:55:58,805 'Has he not said anything to you at all?' 846 00:56:01,205 --> 00:56:03,524 I've spoken to him twice on the phone... 847 00:56:03,525 --> 00:56:07,204 'in the last two weeks since he came to live at yours, 848 00:56:07,205 --> 00:56:08,804 'all of it very perfunctory.' 849 00:56:08,805 --> 00:56:13,124 Not exactly flavour of the month at the moment, am I? 850 00:56:13,125 --> 00:56:14,525 'What, still?' 851 00:56:15,885 --> 00:56:18,844 'It's just a bit much, isn't it?' 852 00:56:18,845 --> 00:56:22,284 Our parents are getting married and they don't even want us there. 853 00:56:22,285 --> 00:56:24,725 Perhaps they don't want a fuss. 854 00:56:26,805 --> 00:56:29,524 Gillian, I'm going to have to go. I'm chairing a meeting. 855 00:56:29,525 --> 00:56:31,924 Right. Sorry, is that all right? Can I ring you...? 856 00:56:31,925 --> 00:56:33,325 Bi... 857 00:57:09,405 --> 00:57:11,204 Shall we get married and not tell anyone? 858 00:57:11,205 --> 00:57:14,444 'You doing anything this weekend?' What did you have in mind? All sorts. 859 00:57:14,445 --> 00:57:18,364 I want a baby. 860 00:57:18,365 --> 00:57:20,124 No. 861 00:57:20,125 --> 00:57:22,804 No, Caroline, I'm serious. 862 00:57:22,805 --> 00:57:25,004 Just keep pushing, love! keep pushing. 863 00:57:25,005 --> 00:57:28,124 Keep squeezing Grandad's hand. He's not me grandad! 864 00:57:28,125 --> 00:57:31,564 We'd have never carried on like that at that age, would we? 865 00:57:31,565 --> 00:57:34,364 Don't go, Dad. 866 00:57:34,365 --> 00:57:38,044 I don't know how you could fashion talking to your dad like this, 867 00:57:38,045 --> 00:57:40,724 when you know how poorly he's been. 868 00:57:40,725 --> 00:57:42,205 Pow. 869 00:57:43,031 --> 00:58:13,780 Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells